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  • Resident Evil: Retribution

    Resident Evil: Retribution

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    Cinematic Perfection

    "It's just like a camera. Point and shoot."

    Deconstructs the cinematic template to an expressively artificial actuality of unparalleled, surrealist imagery unlike anything else seen in contemporary time - through which Paul W.S. Anderson's unadulterated ambition equates to that of an emotionally singular/conceptual/executional enterprise of an inevitable timeline (ex: artifice vs. its repurposing by evil; digitization paving the way for an uncanny valley being caught between what's real and what convinces us of a genuine reality/fake reality... until…

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  • Tremors

    Tremors

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    B

    "I'm gonna kick his ass!"

    Underground monster has big mouth and can swallow anyone or anything on land. He also has the power to move tectonic plates (he can do it, I know he can). Translation: it's a lot of fun, very silly, and has some delightful SFX. We need more monster films.

  • The Hills Have Eyes

    The Hills Have Eyes

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    Unrated Version: B

    "Today, the government still denies the genetic effects caused by the radioactive fallout..."

    Slightly prefer this to the original film - which had proved to be somewhat underwhelming in its tackling of America's social inhumanity, cultural poisoning, bourgeois-driven economic divisions, and the anguish of the oppressed/minorities fighting against a familial representation of elites. Here, Alexandre Aja commits to the full-on grotesqueness and vulgarity of its American desolation (even including a kill via American flag); a display of…

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  • Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle

    Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle

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    B

    "That was so intense, I like can’t even with this place."

    Some of the best things to come from 2017:

    -The Rock annihilating people (and blinding the audience) with his smoldering intensity.

    -Jack Black complaining about being an overweight middle-aged man who has no access to "her" phone until a hippo performs a sneak attack on "her" which later leads to a major crush on Nick Jonas.

    -Karen Gillan doing *anything* of which includes jaw-dropping dance fighting and her…

  • Star Wars: The Last Jedi

    Star Wars: The Last Jedi

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    Cinematic Perfection

    "The Rebellion is reborn today. The war is just beginning. And I will not be the last Jedi."

    The scarce case of perfection being made by its imperfections and characters themselves wrestling with their own imperfection; a bleeding heart that empathetically absorbs all the collective pain and poetry of the past - via tackling the reconstructive opportunities and extensive consequences of failure - to forge a new reality. Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi, in an…