• The Devil Wears Prada

    The Devil Wears Prada

    how delicious the prospect of throwing oneself whole into a project

    also imagine if miranda and andy fell in love

  • Good Burger

    Good Burger

    Working 8 hours a day at a wage for $5 per hour, it would take Dexter Reed (Kel Thompson) 47.5 days to repay his debt of $1900, not including taxes. To repay the debt of $2500, Dexter would have to work 62.5 days, roughly a half month less than Mr. Wright (Sinbad)'s estimate (two and a half months), although Mr. Wright may have taken taxes into account (granted, he may not have known Dexter's wages per hour). At the end…

  • Fear of Rain

    Fear of Rain

    a kind of voyeurism, perhaps

  • Pokémon: Lucario and the Mystery of Mew

    Pokémon: Lucario and the Mystery of Mew

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Cried: 1:16 (Ash and Pikachu reunite), and a few minutes later when Ash DIES and it pans to his hat, forgotten.

    Highlights:
    - A different narrator---and it turns out it's the current voice of Dr. Eggman.
    - Heavy "fantasy babble" (a term I first heard from Arin Hanson of Game Grumps)
    - Ash and May send out their entire teams at a party full of people, because they are children with no idea how to act in mixed company
    -…

  • Pokémon 3: The Movie - Spell of the Unown

    Pokémon 3: The Movie - Spell of the Unown

    Cried: 00:7:00 (The first time Entei manifests)

    Highlights:
    - The real mystery is how a professor, successful or not, could afford a mansion like that.
    - Two excellent mullets in the form of Molly's dad and his assistant.
    - I played Pokemon Sword while watching this so I didn't jot down too many details but believe me, I choked up the whole film

    If this ain't the best Pokemon film... I didn't realize how engrained this movie was into my…

  • Pokémon: The Movie 2000

    Pokémon: The Movie 2000

    Cried: 35 minutes in (Pokemon rush to the islands to help)

    Highlights:
    - Amazon Prime listed this movie as "Rated G, with sexual content, violence, foul language." The only potential sexual content I could find was the tail-end of a joke told by Melody's sister: "And she says, 'No, but I have Krabbies!'"
    - An overarching theme to this film is one of my childhood pet peeves: "Oh, you hang out with a GIRL? Is she your GIRLFRIEND?"
    - I…

  • Pokémon the Movie: I Choose You!

    Pokémon the Movie: I Choose You!

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Cried: 1 hour 22 minutes in

    Highlights:
    - Pikachu speaks, and it is very sweet, but admittedly I laughed in surprise
    - Ash has a near-death experience (this is when I cried)
    - "You're like your father!" - Delia Ketchum, indicative of a messy divorce (probably not)
    - End credits song may make it into one of my playlists

    Summary (SPOILERS):
    The Pokemon Company tugs on the heartstrings with this retelling of the original series. Lots of classic plotlines make…

  • Pokémon the Movie: The Power of Us

    Pokémon the Movie: The Power of Us

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Cried: Roughly one hour in, as Risa weighs having to run to the eternal flame

    Highlights:
    - Humanist anthem in the end credits ("I believe in the power of us ...")
    - Environmentalism, a classic Pokemon stance
    - Am I Toren or do I want to cradle his sweet, be-monocled face in my hands
    - Gratuitous? inclusion of Ash Ketchum, an enthusiastic and unflawed child just passing through
    - Give Risa her own show

    Synopsis/teaser (SPOILERS AHOY):
    Fula City is…

  • Lolita

    Lolita

    yeah i don't know dude

  • The Pest

    The Pest

    ½

    let it be known i suffered today. awful in so many ways

  • Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

    Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

    bit of a boys' club but enjoyable. i'd give my life for connie sachs

  • Eight Crazy Nights

    Eight Crazy Nights

    good lord