I try to be funny, but I'll settle for stupid.
Well, movies, we had a good run. And I really thought we were going to make this last for the long haul, I really did. We've shared a lot of great memories (remember that one time, you know, with all the cars, and the one car goes from one skyscraper into the other skyscraper? That was a good one). But for all the excitement, the vulnerability, the intimacy, the passion, we both knew something was going to get in the…
I went to see this during the middle of the day on a weekday, so I didn't expect there to be much of a crowd. And I was right. There was just one guy in the theater when I walked in. The lights were just dimming for the trailers, so I didn't get a good look at him, but I could tell he was an older gentleman.
I watched the film. Nothing special, of course. Just another mindless, miscalculated studio…
Wakaliwood movies exist on a plane of cultural value that common critical metrics simply cannot measure. Star ratings appear as meaningless abstractions in the face of this pure entertainment spectacle.
In the behind the scenes footage for Bad Black, Alan Hofmanis (who plays the American doctor), discusses how director Isaac Nabwana gave Hofmanis his character's (very cool) sunglasses in order to make him Schwarzenegger. Hofmanis said, no, I am not Schwarzenegger. And Nabwana said, "the camera will make you [Schwarzenegger]."…
Let's call this a 1.75/5, and then let's just call the whole thing off.
This film's premise/twist/hook/what-have-you is fine, and I could see it working with different execution. And there is clearly passion from the creative voices beyond this to say something politically resonant. It just does not come together, not hardly at all.
The film opens with a reasonably elegant long take, a reasonably elegant string score slowly building as the geography of the plantation…
Hooptober 8.0 - 13/31
The Skull drinking game: *
-> Drink every time someone says "the skull of the Marquis de Sade"
-> Drink every time someone picks up said skull of the Marquis de Sade
-> Drink every time the camera is placed behind the eyes of the skull of the Marquis de Sade
-> Finish your drink when the skull of the Marquis de Sade becomes sentient and floats around in midair
A fun, minor Hammer-- I mean…