B E R T

Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?

Favorite films

  • Grey Gardens
  • Gypsy 83
  • Birth
  • The Craft

Recent activity

All
  • Eyes of Laura Mars

    ★★★★

  • Aftermath

    ★½

  • Finding You

    ★★★½

  • Halston

    ★★★★

Recent reviews

More
  • Eyes of Laura Mars

    Eyes of Laura Mars

    ★★★★

    Stylish, sexy and so damn cool.

    The movie opens to Prisoner by Barbra Streisand, that really sets the mood for the stylish and dark disco vibe of the film. So good, the fashion, the kills, the music, Faye Dunaway widening her eyes in every single scene, just so much yassssss!!!

    Neon Demon meets Star 80.

    Bruce LaBruce is making a hardcore gay version of this and I cannot wait.

  • Aftermath

    Aftermath

    ★½

    Oh dear this was not good. An overly long and bloated mess of a movie that just bored me to tears, it never felt interesting or seemed to be going in any one direction. The first hour doesn’t know if it’s a horror film or a domestic drama, and eventually fails at both. Similar films have used this concept and done better, see Things Heard And Seen. Ashley Greene was fine, but even my mild liking of her wasn’t enough to make me enjoy this.

Popular reviews

More
  • Wrong Turn

    Wrong Turn

    Good god that was SHIT!! Sorry not sorry I know a lot of horror fans are gonna love this for creating something new and different and all the rest of it, but this little duck right here? I hated it. It started out pretty decent, as you’d expect a movie in this franchise to be, but once it hit the middle point and the whole thing came together I was just thinking how lame. Nah uh. Overwritten, trying so hard…

  • Scream

    Scream

    ★★★★

    Still letting it cook a little but my initial thoughts after having just seen it tonight is that it’s fun, on-brand for the franchise, features some brutal kills and is cleverly meta (perhaps too meta?).

    The new characters were awful, I didn’t really like any of them, a group of good actors playing annoying characters, but that’s ok, I’m not here to see them really, I’m here for Neve, Courtney and David, and they’re wonderful. Neve Campbell, what a trooper,…