JR has written 19 reviews for films rated ★★½ during 2021.

  • Spider-Man 3

    Spider-Man 3

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    So Harry realizes his dad was Green Goblin and instead if thinking "aw fair enough, Peter killed my murderous dad in defence of the city and himself" he thinks "na, I'm still gonna try murder Peter". What a dick.

    An absalute shitshow but it gets 2 and a half stars for emo, badboy Peter Parker. Fucking hilarious.

    48/100

  • Return of the Jedi

    Return of the Jedi

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    How was I meant to take Luke's fight with Vader serious when the same motherfucker was tied up captured by a group of primitive teddy bears not so long beforehand¿

    You can pinpoint the moment that Luke realizes he's fantasized about fucking his sister multiple times.

    45/100

  • Solo: A Star Wars Story

    Solo: A Star Wars Story

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Childish Gambino? more like Stylish Landino.

    So many shitty plot twists that I didn't care about.
    Starting to love simply exploring the Star Wars universe though.

    51/100

  • Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

    Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Up next: Indiana Jones and the Crystal Hip.

    This honestly wasn't too bad but that whole high CGI/ alien/ indermentional aspect is so extremely out of place.

    53/100

  • Death Proof

    Death Proof

    ★★½

    Tarantino at his absolute horniest.

    Too much girly chitter chatter, not enough bloody splitter splatter.

    53/100

  • Bottle Rocket

    Bottle Rocket

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Movie logic be like:
    Follow girl who's doing her job around + communicate with her like 5 times = sex + love

    The funniest part of this movie is how untroubled all the hostages are. Like they mustn't have even been bothered to help the police identify Anthony and co.

    54/100

  • Watchmen

    Watchmen

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Did they CGI Dr Manhattan's knob in or did Billy Crudup just have it hanging out while filming?

    They were making a movie about masked vigilantes (and a blue god?) so they decided to give one guy a knockoff Batman voice and another guy a knockoff Batman suit. There was also a knockoff rich orphan Bruce Wayne guy.

    51/100

  • The Devil Wears Prada

    The Devil Wears Prada

    ★★½

    Why'd they try act like Anne Hathaway wasn't attractive because she was wearing a wooly jumper¿

    "Praises due to the most fly, Prada"-irrelevant Kanye West lyric that came to mind while watching this movie.

    48/100

  • Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

    Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Ron Burgundy is miles out of Veronicas league.

    The jokes don't hit 60% of the time everytime, they hit 52% of the time (I counted).

    53/100

  • Ant-Man

    Ant-Man

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I'm not sure if it was bad acting or the fact he was bald but Cross was such a shit villain. Its hilarious that one of his "evil" moments is him using a lamb instead of a mouse in the testing lab.

    This is the closest were gonna get to a sequel of A Bugs World.

    50/100

  • Iron Man 2

    Iron Man 2

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    How could Rhodey conveniently fit in one of Tony’s suits?

    I knew Tony was a genius but I didn't know he was this much of a genius.

    47/100

  • Dark Phoenix

    Dark Phoenix

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Why the fuck did they name the school after Jean? She literally murders Mystique and then cleans up a mess that she herself made.

    This as the series finale is baffling. They ruin Mystique and then try villainize Charles for whatever reason.

    45/100