Conner Wilson

Conner Wilson

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New Mutants is still delayed in my heart

“Favorites” are four of my favorite first-time watches of last year

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  • Batman Begins

    Batman Begins

    ★★★★

    “Well, well, You took my advice about theatricality a bit literally”

    -A man whose entire posse consists of matte-black-clad ninjas in Sub-Zero masks, bald Asian men with matching Fu-Manchus, and Scarecrow

  • Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones

    Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones

    ★½

    There’s this part in the absurdly long Geonosis coliseum sequence where Padme jumps from a tall pillar onto this big hard-skinned rhino creature, and it seems like her vag would be completely obliterated by the impact. She’s not a freakin’ Jedi! She can’t just fall crotch-first from that kind of height right onto this thing’s spine! She’s gonna have bruising for sure.

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  • Hellboy Animated: Sword of Storms

    Hellboy Animated: Sword of Storms

    ★★★

    It’s like being in a cartoon!

    This is the first of two animated films that are set in (or I guess are adjacent to?) the Guillermo Del Toro Hellboy movies, and although not directed by him, it retains much of their charm. The returning cast (especially Ron Perlman) help with that feeling, bringing extra personality and humor to an already serviceable TV-movie.

    I kinda wish we had gotten more Del Toro Hellboy films. If you feel the same way, then I’d say…

  • A Talking Cat!?!

    A Talking Cat!?!

    ½

    Chris has way more chemistry with Trent than with Frannie. Let your twink flag fly, Chris! An icon of New Queer Cinema.

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