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Pinned reviews

  • Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

    Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    “A Jedi’s weapon deserves more respect.”

    Rian Johnson’s refusal to accommodate the vision of J.J. Abrams made for an amusing case of corporate sabotage in Star Wars: The Last Jedi. It was darkly admirable — poor for the sustenance of the story at large but functional as an avenue for Johnson’s personal expression. The story was effectively over, free of any dangling threads or the slightest implication that a third film was truly necessary.

    The Rise of Skywalker’s grand conceit…

Recent reviews

  • The Hollars

    The Hollars

    A putrid indie air ball that amalgamates The Office and the already-horrendous Garden State. Undeniable evidence of Krasinski’s behind-camera lack of stamina.

  • The Dark Knight Rises

    The Dark Knight Rises


    An astonishing Dickensian tone poem. The most moving and accomplished installment of not only its trilogy, but its ruinous genre.

    Ascend and surmount the insurmountable.

Popular reviews

  • Notes from Melanie

    Notes from Melanie


    Little more than an excuse for Stuckmann to fellate his idols and declare his alienation with the studio system. Not a single joke lands, neither in dialogue nor in the props that beg for attention in the cluttered background. Both leads are disposable, predictably peppy rom-com airheads.

    Immediately, we realize we’re watching a solid content creator beg for validation. One of his first contributions to the medium he’s made a living criticizing is a plainly desperate failure.

  • Captain Marvel

    Captain Marvel

    The beginning of summer 2017 saw the release of Patty Jenkins’ Wonder Woman and its subsequent acclaim, coupled with stratospheric box office returns. The Gal Gadot starrer was delightful, bringing a truly stellar female protagonist into the landscape of comic book films.

    Nearly two years later, directors Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck have successfully ground out the one of the most infuriating superhero adventures in years in their quest to bring Carol Danvers, another female comic book icon, to the silver…