cupofcoffinjoe

cupofcoffinjoe

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My hovercraft is full of eels.

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  • The Master Touch

    The Master Touch

    ★★★★

    RIP Kirk Douglas

    Kirk Douglas stars in this surprisingly entertaining Italian/German heist film, directed by Michele Lupo. Lupo made several Bud Spencer westerns, as well as other exploitation fare like Weekend Murders and the great Lee Van Cleef vehicle Escape from Death Row.

    Douglas gives it his all in his rare excursion into Eurotrash; he's not just cashing a check like some American Eurotrash regulars. Here he conspires with a trapeze artist named Marco (Giuliano Gemma, star of countless Italian…

  • Zombie 3

    Zombie 3

    ★★★★½

    I'm awed by how much better this movie is than I remembered it being. It's pretty awful, but it's awful in all the best ways possible. If I wasn't laughing, I was cheering.

    Make no mistake, I have the utmost respect for Lucio Fulci. But when it comes to pure Italian, brain seizing what-the-fuckness, no one beats Bruno Mattei. And in Zombie 3, I get both Fulci and Mattei! The gods of Italian cinema rain down glorious, goofy gifts upon…

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  • Godzilla vs. Megalon

    Godzilla vs. Megalon

    ★★★½

    Unfortunately, the kaiju do not actually fight on top of the World Trade Towers.

  • Destroy All Monsters

    Destroy All Monsters

    ★★★★★

    We had a killer Godzilla triple bill this year for our annual Hi-Way Halloween Hell Night event, held at our favorite upstate NY drive-in. The temperature was in the mid-60's right through midnight on October 24th, making it an almost supernaturally beautiful night.

    Even more surprisingly, despite having seen this countless times, I was completely caught off guard by a different, and sometimes outlandishly funny, dub job. Thanks to some knowledgeable fans, I learned that Toho dubbed their own films…

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  • The Room

    The Room

    ★★

    First off, you named your movie The Room? What the hell is wrong with you guys? Why not just go all out and call it The Birdemic Room of Troll 2?

    Well, nevermind that. How's the movie? Husband and wife move into new home. They find a hidden room. Hubby discovers that he can spawn an infinite amount of liquor in The Room! You'd think that would be enough--movie over. But no, he orders up a bunch of fine art,…

  • Time Trap

    Time Trap

    ★★★★

    This is an easy front-runner for the "Best Movie of the Year I'd Never Heard of." With zero name recognition and it's goofy 1990's title and poster art, I probably wouldn't have given this little movie a second thought. But it was the 80th most downloaded movie of the day, and it had a good review on the IMDB, so, I thought, why not give it a quick whirl?

    Despite the fact that this sort of thing never goes well...this…