Fist of Jesus ★★★★

"I don't care how many fishes you have! You're gonna die!" (Yeah, the subtitle said 'fishes'.)

I got here from the game they made of this (store.steampowered.com/app/321110/). It's alright, but it definitely feels like an over-priced mobile app, right down to some bizarre controls.

Anyway, I'm not here to review that. This is a review of the original short film (www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuKV2Z3eYTY).

Spanish Jesus fucks shit up. If that intrigues you, go for it. If not, don't bother. Simple enough. Since I'm weird, of course it intrigued me.

Also, Spanish Judas is happy as hell throughout most of this short. His smile never seems to break.

The basic synopsis is of Jesus resurrecting Sp......okay, it's a Spanish-language production. You're also going to have to get used to that. As I was saying, Jesus resurrects Lazarus....as a zombie, immediately resulting in a zombie apocalypse since Jesus is actually an amateur and that was his first attempt. Finding no other way out, he will have to use the power of the....fish of Jesus? Waiiiiit, that's not the title! Oh well, I'll accept it.

One of the first things you'll notice is the large amount of gore. There's a bunch of blood and guts flying in all sorts of directions and it is pretty wonderful. This movie is not to be taken seriously. I mean, they even use stock gun sounds from 60s/70s westerns.

If there's anything truly disappointing about this short, it's that for being called "FIST of Jesus", he uses his feet more.