Joel Duscher

Joel Duscher

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I like watching movies and making lists. Letterboxd will inevitably destroy my life.

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  • E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial

    E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial

    ★★★★

    Took a while for the movie to suck me in, but it’s a classic for a reason. Once it got going, I was 100% on board!

    One thing that surprised me though was how much I want E.T. (the alien) to die by my hand. He’s a wet yuck fella that I can’t stop thinking about beating to death with a shovel. I think that would be unreal.

  • Drive

    Drive

    ★★★★★

    I’m going to level with you all, i would fuck this movie if I could.

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  • Oliver & Company

    Oliver & Company

    ★★★½

    Back when Disney didn’t give a shit about toning things down for children.

    80s Disney will kill a man with a train on screen they don’t care. This is real life kids, sometimes people smoke cigars and get obliterated by a train as an act of revenge instigated by a ragtag team of dogs.

    Grow up and deal with it.

  • The Happening

    The Happening

    ★★

    The acting, directing and writing of this movie is so fucking dogshit BUT it’s hard to deny the charm of a movie where trees, grass and bushes team up to make everyone kill themselves! Plants are angry and release a smell that makes people shoot themselves in the head!! A man commits suicide by feeding himself to lions!!! Powerful concept!!!!

    This was the first movie I watched when Disney Plus added 600 new titles to their streaming service. Bet that’s REALLY fucked Disney’s analytics right up. Cop that, mouse.

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  • Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)

    Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)

    ★★★

    It’s fine! Like, very aggressively fine! It’s so fine that I have no opinions either way! Well done movie, you were a movie I saw! 

    Since I have nothing really to say about this movie, I’d just like to take this time to wish Jared Leto nothing but the absolute worst. Hope your day is REAL shit Jared, you cunt.