• The Mitchells vs. The Machines

    The Mitchells vs. The Machines

    ★½

    “a fantastic blend of humour and familial love, a wonderfully light comedy about a dynamic family & a solid reflection of society today - expertly pieced together in another zinger from sony animations”

    that’s what i would have said if the mitchells had succeeded in doing any of the over-ambitious things it had tried to do.

    the first problem i have is that the movie keeps telling us the mitchells are #weird and #quirky, without them actually doing anything #weird or…

  • The Wolf of Snow Hollow

    The Wolf of Snow Hollow

    ★★★★½

    Hear me out guys: Jim Cummings as Kevin Price in the Book of Mormon. Don't tell me you can't see it.

  • Dredd

    Dredd

    ★★★

    too style over substance to leave a mark, too dark to be any fun, and too synthetic to invoke sympathy for any of its characters - dredd isnt a bad movie - it just feels ten times removed from its audience. 

    dredd drags itself from scene to scene with a dreariness that heightens its disconnected narrative beats, but none of them last long enough to make an impact - resulting in a final product so unsatisfactorily average it becomes upsetting,…

  • Sunshine

    Sunshine

    ★★★

    sunshine walked so interstellar could run.

    the first two-thirds are outright solid, but sunshine completely derails in the last 30 minutes (very disappointing considering its impressive cast and auteur). the premise is engaging, and thematically it touches on the meaning of sacrifice and higher purpose - which would have made such a tight film had it succeeded in executing any of its ideas. but eighty minutes in and sunshine transforms from cinematic piece to horror flick with its own freddy-krueger-like…

  • Mayhem

    Mayhem

    ★★★½

    I’ve always had a strong dislike for egregious gore in movies. I find endless montages of murder & rape truly disparaging and it always leaves me with the harrowing conclusion that some people must enjoy seeing their violent fantasies played out on screen - why else would Texas Chainsaw Massacre be popular? It’s why I’ve only ever seen one Purge movie and why I generally tend to stay away from slasher horror - because the genre itself is generated on shock…

  • Barbie: Princess Adventure

    Barbie: Princess Adventure

    ★★

    just make ken & trey gay you cowards @ mattel

  • To All the Boys: Always and Forever

    To All the Boys: Always and Forever

    ★★★½

    P.S. I Still Love You: a morally corrupt, glorified love triangle where Peter is depicted as a jealous, annoying and subliminally controlling boyfriend with no redeeming features.

    Always and Forever: an emotionally rich conclusion with surprising depth, fun situations, satisfying characterisation and overall, a much more mature Peter Kavinsky.

    It's not the best movie in the world, nor even the best rom-com in an already oversaturated genre of cinema, but it did astonish me with the sophistication of its themes…

  • Ruby Sparks

    Ruby Sparks

    ★★½

    Paul Dano's character Calvin did NOT deserve a happy ending - and that's the only reason why this film fails.

    This movie - written by the prolific, and on all counts brilliant - Zoe Kazan, was so apt when it touched on the morals of removing the agency of Ruby at first. How Ruby was not written as a person, but an idea - a concept for a desperate and lonely man. How she, by herself, felt lonely and incomplete.…

  • Anna and the Apocalypse

    Anna and the Apocalypse

    ★★★½

    The characters are more or less tropes, some of the audio synchronization is proper patchy, and I don't buy a lot of the supporting actors' portrayals - but despite all that, there is something undeniably charming about Anna and the Apocalypse.

    It was made by a small production studio on a miniscule budget - yet all the songs are original, the set pieces inspired, and some of the actors, (namely Paul Kaye as the Headmaster, and Ben Wiggins as Nick)…

  • Oldboy

    Oldboy

    ★★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    no one:

    absolutely no one:

    incestuous couples after watching this: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

  • Dumplin'

    Dumplin'

    ★½

    Always glad to see drag representation in cinema but... the combination of the most unlikable leads in movie history + a completely off-sync rendition of “Jolene” equals a film so unpalatable it completely undermines the feel-good moral it sets out to employ.

    Willowdean is so damn unappealing as a protagonist, and I say this as someone who is above her own weight band in real life. All of her hatred is self-perpetuated, her struggles are self-originated, her problems are first-world,…

  • Life of the Party

    Life of the Party

    ★★★

    a lot of the jokes miss rather than land, and it probably would have made a funnier result at a drunk sleepover, but i can't get enough of its honey-sweet core and it's warm, loving heart. such a mess, but a fucking feel-good mess - even if it never goes anywhere and is far less than coherent. watch this with your mom and i guarantee you'll have (some) fun