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  • The Guest

    The Guest

    Dan Stevens could shoot me and I would thank him for it

  • Snake Outta Compton

    Snake Outta Compton

    ★★★★★

    I don't understand how anyone could not have a great time watching this movie. This is black excellence.

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  • Speed Racer

    Speed Racer

    ★★★★★

    Y'know that bit at the end of 2001 where the guy is watching all the trippy visuals and he's almost seizing in his suit? For two hours and fifteen minutes, I was that guy.

    There are so many points of comparison to be made - the works of Quentin Tarantino, Sharkboy And Lavagirl, Epic Rap Battles Of History. This film is all of them and more.

    I can't imagine what it must have been like to see this movie in…

  • Zoom

    Zoom

    ★★

    Important things to note about this movie:
    - the opening scene is Tim Allen making his finger vibrate and sticking it in a glass of soda
    - the boy's power is literally to inflate his body, like what deviantart level trash is this
    - Tim Allen's performance seems to be crappily ripping off RDJ's "Iron Man", but that came out two years after this, so what gives
    - there's no real conflict for the first hour
    - there are like…