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  • Blind Beast

    Blind Beast

    ★★★½

    Blind Beast is such a perversion and contains what could very well be the greatest set of all time.

    Sort of loved how this film had absolutely no one’s best interests in mind.

  • La Llorona

    La Llorona

    ★★★

    Seething, genius sound design. Could have been more punishing as a narrative, especially with how, awfully, timely this particular story is.

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  • Kirikou and the Sorceress

    Kirikou and the Sorceress

    ★★★★

    Despite none of these children deserving their lives to be saved by Kirikou (our lord and savior) because they kept falling for the hot sorceress’s traps, this was GLORIOUS.

    Kirikou robbed my heart when he genuinely said "thank you" to each and every chipmunk who brought him a gift (mostly flowers), even the one who brought him a spider that he probably didn't like but he knew not to show it and to show gratitude instead. Pet your chipmunks and embrace them tenderly.

    Loving mythological magic.

  • A Very Brady Christmas

    A Very Brady Christmas

    I remember my parents turning this off as a kid because of a sex scene and I have since considered it to be the tawdry, “adults only” outing of the Brady Bunch.

    Turns out it was just Jan getting her cardigan removed by her husband. 

    This movie is almost entirely the Brady’s making and coordinating holiday plans and reviewing logistical details for their travels in the ugliest and most bland settings possible.

    It is somehow even hornier than the show…