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  • Irma Vep

    Irma Vep

    ★★★★½

    "I think there are different audiences who like different films, and there's nothing wrong with that."

    A surreal meta-cinematic work. Assayas truly wants to show audiences the truth about film by deconstructing common cinematic misconceptions. The idea that "old cinema" has nothing to offer to the public gets gracefully shot down by Maggie Cheung. Auteurism gets thrown out the window; director Réne barely gets featured, and we instead see how the costume designer, the producer, and the main actress function…

  • The Handmaiden

    The Handmaiden

    ★★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    No, I really don’t think you know how revolutionary this movie is.

    Its cinematography and its production design are absolutely mindblowing. The cameras move around the house so cleanly and presents immaculate tableaus that look more like paintings. The backs of two heads suddenly become a reference to Magritte. A stunning parlor turns into an interior still life. It's all a great tie-in to Hideko's art lessons and how art can be found in the mundane.

    At the same time,…

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  • Ex Machina

    Ex Machina

    It practices the very same harmful gaze that assumes women are simple and sexual attractive beings, so it falls short of being a genuine critique of the violence exerted upon women's bodies.

  • Malcolm & Marie

    Malcolm & Marie

    ½

    Sam, just open your Notes app and rant about how you see Zendaya as your muse but totally not in a sexist way, and how you don't feel like you should be criticized for your work ever. I promise you, you could have saved everyone's time and money.

    Yeah, I couldn't stand this. Zendaya slowly undressing throughout the film while John David Washington just loosens his bowtie by the end, this entire film trying to justify this toxic couple's relationship…

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  • Promising Young Woman

    Promising Young Woman

    ½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    So let me get this straight; you're telling me:

    - Cassie and Nina, the two women most affected by the trauma of rape, both die (suicide and aggressive suffocation, respectively)
    - both of them get gaslit and get told by people that they're "overreacting" and that they should "move on" for the good of everyone
    - Cassie considers "just desserts" in the form of turning Nina's rapist and his supporters over to the justice system, a system that has almost…

  • Artemis Fowl

    Artemis Fowl

    Holly says, and I quote, "I am Holly Short, your ally on the other side."

    Artemis kidnaps you for gold and your actual allies consider nuking the Fowl Manor because of this kidnapping.

    Eoin Colfer must be weeping in his study right now.