Before I Fall ★★★★★

One of those movies that just completely invaded my headspace, to the point I just had to come back to it tonight. I haven't been able to get it out of my mind, and probably won't for a while. Even if it's not at the forefront, it'll be there gnawing away at my thoughts. Hard to comprehend how hard it nails the constant sense of existential dread I feel, that I've let people disappear from my life, that I don't really know what any of this amounts to, that I might not get the chance to really express everything I feel all the time.

Everything hit even harder the second time too, fuck. Feels like it was meant to be watched over and over, knowing what's coming elevates the experience more than anything else, and all the emotional beats that felt corny the first time around work. I'm rambling at this point but I don't know how else to talk about this movie other than just throw things at the wall, it's like watching Edge of Seventeen or Almost Famous or Lady Bird for the first time and just feeling seen in a way most movie just aren't capable of.