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  • Locked Down

    Locked Down


    "I'd never accuse you of being happy and normal" -Paxton,

    Who the fuck cares?

    This feels like they had a boring script and then decided that what would fix it is Covid. I'm not saying that is the case for sure I'm just saying that's what it feels like. I found this movie to be VERY boring, like aggressively boring. Even the heist stuff is boring..... BORING. It's harmless it just didn't bring me a single ounce of joy.


  • Pieces of a Woman

    Pieces of a Woman


    "That is your way, that is not my way" -Martha,

    - 2020 Ranked: boxd.it/4zdAI

    One cool scene and a bunch of poop.

    I find this film to be disappointing. The first 30 minutes are cool, but those are long forgotten after the 1 hour and 37 minutes of weirdly paced boring nonsense you get put through afterwards. I'm not even sure I love the acting as much as some people do... I mean it's fine but I'm not sure it warrants special attention this year. It's just a strange movie that switches focus a lot and leaves a lot unfinished.

    It's a no from me.

Recent reviews

  • Slumdog Millionaire

    Slumdog Millionaire


    "When somebody asks me a question, I tell them the answer. " -Jamal,

    - Danny Boyle Ranked: boxd.it/7vYl0

    Good, but kind of cheesy.

    Dev Patel is fantastic, the film looks pretty good, and it's definitely engaging. I think I just found all of the suffering being used to build up to a happy ending, or somewhat happy ending, to be weird in that it fails to really engage with the factors that caused all that suffering... or maybe I'm overthinking…

  • The Bay

    The Bay


    "I say we develop the hell out of it and then we pay to clean up the bay" -Mayoral candidate,

    - Horror Hunt #31 (Jan '21): boxd.it/aya9m "political horror"


    A mockumentary style horror that is not so much bad as it is not good. The movie tries so hard and I was kind of rooting for it but it's just a fairly average political horror about the ways in which bureaucracy and greed can, and eventually will, end the planet and all of humanity. The acting is fine, the footage is fine... it's all fine but not great.


Popular reviews

  • Dora and the Lost City of Gold

    Dora and the Lost City of Gold


    This movie is fine but its target demographic is 4-10 year olds that aren't scaredy cats.

    10 Better Things to do Than Critically Evaluate this as an Adult:

    (1) Criticize a foreign film without subtitles because you didn't understand the language.

    (2) Criticize the local news for having a depressing ending.

    (3) Tell a child that her taste in music sucks.

    (4) Read a child psychology book

    (5) Call Mr. Rogers a commie bastard.

    (6) Talk to people in the…

  • Soul



    "You can't crush a soul here... that's what life on Earth is for" -22,

    - 2020 Ranked: boxd.it/4zdAI
    - Pixar Movies Ranked: boxd.it/5eFMu

    It's fine.

    I found this to be a fairly predictable and standard story lacking in much creativity visually or in narrative. It is decently executed film but I doubt I'll rewatch it the way that I do certain other Pixar movies. I didn't find Tina Fey's 22 or Jamie Foxx's Joe Gardner to be very interesting characters…