• Assault on Precinct 13

    Assault on Precinct 13

    ★★★★½

    Totally normal LA street gang using Mauser Broomhandles

  • Dracula

    Dracula

    ★★★½

    Steamy!

  • Godzilla vs. Kong

    Godzilla vs. Kong

    ★★★½

    An extra half star solely for the legitimization of hollow earth discourse.

  • Aliens

    Aliens

    ★★★★½

    If Promising Young Woman left you hungry for a feminist revenge thriller that was actually good, then Aliens is the movie for you.

  • ¡Three Amigos!

    ¡Three Amigos!

    ★★★

    “Take the Amigos’ clothes!”

    The Blue Shadows scene is better than most musicals. GRAMMY SNUB

  • Norwegian Wood

    Norwegian Wood

    ★★★

    Murakami March #4

    A movie that reeks of wasted potential. It feels so close to greatness in many aspects but falls shorts of them all. Standout score from Jonny Greenwood. Idk... just listen to the soundtrack while reading the book.

  • In the Mood for Love

    In the Mood for Love

    ★★★★½

    Wong Kar-Wai Wednesday

    Beautiful and heartbreaking!

  • Justice League

    Justice League

    ★½

    I’m probably the last person in the world to finally see this and I don’t have much to add. A 30-minute movie frontloaded with 90 minutes of exposition.

    Here’s to another four hours!

  • Attack on a Bakery

    Attack on a Bakery

    ★★★½

    Murakami March #3

    I'm curious why, out of his massive literary œuvre, the short story "The Second Bakery Attack" is the Murakami work with the most filmed adaptations (four by my count).

    By comparison, this was a massive improvement over the Cuarón adaptation. The decision to focus on the first bakery attack (as opposed to the titular second one) was a great choice. Refined from the vagueness of the original into an economic fable on the consequences of capitalism that mostly works. No sponsorship from McDonald's... we love to see it.

  • A Girl, She Is 100%

    A Girl, She Is 100%

    ★★★★

    Murakami March #2

    Now this is more like it! A near exact adaptation of the short story "On Seeing the 100% Perfect Girl One Beautiful April Morning." Wonderfully stylized to match Murakami's playful, melancholic prose. The stop motion and pseudo-animation was great.

  • Cinema Paradiso

    Cinema Paradiso

    ★★½

    Heavy-handed Italian sentimentality. Overall it felt very scattered and unsure of what it wanted to say. Is it a meditation on movies? Classic cinema is only referenced in the most cursory way, mostly consisting of literal lip service. Much of the story takes place at the theater, yes, but we see little of the effect of movies on the characters. The mythic "magic" of the movies seems to only be that they're a cool place for the whole town to…

  • Murder Among the Mormons

    Murder Among the Mormons

    ★★★

    Cozy afternoon watch. It should prove to be interesting even if you're already familiar with the events. Adulthood is resigning yourself to the fact that Jared Hess will never make something on par with Napoleon Dynamite ever again. Real heads will have this feeling.