• House of Wax

    House of Wax


    you don't get it, they're all wax.

    okay, final thoughts

    concept: fucking terrifying
    run-time: way too long
    origins of the villains: ?? confusing, maybe i wasn’t paying enough attention
    acting: pretty bad

    this movie made wax look so disgusting, i gagged so many times. it’s good on horror movie standards.

  • Stoker



    i’ve often wondered why it is we have children...

    this was kind of sloppy in the first half, but the ending was fantastic, and the cinematography and directorial style was phenomenal throughout. the performances were also really good, but the story wasn’t my favorite.

  • Big Fish

    Big Fish


    they say when you meet the love of your life, time stops, and that's true.

    this got me crying at the end but the first half was so bland to me. from the circus onward, it was pretty decent, still not all that special. i’m not a huge fan of everything tim burton does, and i guess this was not for me, but i can guarantee that most people will get more out of this than i did.

  • Interstellar



    what happens now?

    i’m screaming about how much i love this movie. i’ve heard a lot of negative reviews for this, and i understand it has issues, but it’s flawless to me. the plot is just complex enough where it’s not too confusing, but it still shows off nolan’s insane level of creativity and intelligence. i think it’s perfect.

  • Cam



    you don't wanna see stuff like this? stay off the internet.

    this surpassed my expectations by a mile. the concept is terrifying and the world is immersive and interesting. everyone compares it to black mirror, and it really is very similar, and that might be why i like it so much. i had to stop watching it about halfway through, but i couldn’t stop thinking about it.

  • Beautiful Boy

    Beautiful Boy


    i love you more than everything.

    the performances were good, and the story was emotional, but the execution was pretty shit. the music was god awful and kept taking me out of the experience, it was so jarring. the film was just really jumbled and it could’ve been a lot better.

  • The Final Girls

    The Final Girls


    movies like this end when the final girl kills the bad guy and the credits roll.

    this was stupid and cheesy, but that’s also sorta of the point. it’s like a mix of teen beach movie and cabin in the woods. the acting and editing can be ungodly bad at points, but otherwise it was just a short and fun watch.

  • The Beguiled

    The Beguiled


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    what have you bitches done to me?

    i strongly believe sofia coppola should do every period drama from now on. this deserves much more praise than it’s getting, especially with the ending. the cast was phenomenal and i was hooked on the story. there were still room for improvements, but it didn’t disappoint.

  • Anatomy of a Murder

    Anatomy of a Murder


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    how can a jury disregard what it's already heard?

    this first act was pretty slow, but once it got to the court stuff, i was sucked in. there are obviously some remarks that are incredibly outdated, but they didn’t ruin the movie for me. jimmy stewart and the score are incredible, and i think this is a good place to start if you’re trying to get into older films.

  • Never Goin' Back

    Never Goin' Back


    fucking disgusting rent-a-cop wannabe woody allen looking dickface.

    i adored the female friendship representation in this so, so much. i think the needle drops were so funny, and i thought the story was fun and fast-paced. i was really annoyed by the male characters in this and i wish it solely focused on angela and jessie. this was just really cute and refreshing.

  • Suspiria



    bad luck isn't brought by broken mirrors, but by broken minds.

    this is a classic. the acting is a little cheesy in some parts, but it just adds to the charm of the film. i loved the story a lot more the second time around, and the horror is seriously terrifying. i think it’s perfect.

  • The Neon Demon

    The Neon Demon


    they starve to death, hoping, praying that one day they’ll look like a second-rate version of me.

    this is my cup of tea right here. i was not a huge fan of drive, probably because i didn’t know it was kind of slow. i knew what i was getting into this time, and i loved it. i didn’t understand the keanu reeves parts? like at all? but otherwise, this is perfect, and i love films that deal with obsession.