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  • Twister

    Twister

    ★★★½

    A very effective horror movie about Bill Paxton being a horrible fiancé

  • The Abyss

    The Abyss

    ★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I’ve been Abyss-pilled. Love it. Love gruff Ed Harris, love “bitch” Mary Elizabeth Mastraninio, love the alien made out of a tube of water, even love the SEAL who gets Pressure Madness.

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  • Happiest Season

    Happiest Season

    ★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I was in the same program in college as Mackenzie Davis. She had a fancy blue bicycle with a basket on the front she would ride around campus, and was so hot she intimated everyone. She wore a beret to our seminar on Chaucer. She wore a completely see through white shirt with no bra to our class on southern lit. She was honestly very cool and smart even though she was mostly famous at that time for being a…

  • The Queen's Gambit

    The Queen's Gambit

    ★★★

    The chess and outfits were cool but why did they make the lovelorn drummer kid from love, actually into a sexually active bad boy? That should be illegal.