issy 🥝’s review published on Letterboxd:
steve when he puts a cap and some sunglasses on: Hello fellow friend of ambiguous nationality. My name is Roger Stevenson and I have never been in the army. I am just here in the Big Apple store to look at holiday destinations. Do not mind this USB stick I am pulling out of my blue jean front pocket. I am merely a fanatic of USB sticks. These small devices, such a wonder to me, I have used them so often in the 31 years I have been alive. Also do not concern yourself with my friend Will Samson or our female companion Ramona Nathaniel she is an employee at the juices bar across the way of this mall and likes to join us on our weekly Big Apple visits during her work breaks. I have been deciding on which computer machine to buy for quite some time now. I do not read the newspaper so do not ask me anything about current affairs. I am not caught up on the big, ah, superpeople situation as you may call it, haha! When I hear the word S.H.I.E.L.D I think 'from what?' haha! What a silly thing to say! I am a man of a small life, with good principles. I merely put my blue jeans on one leg at a time and listen to your brilliant Marvin Gaye on my morning run. I enjoy many cereals. I have never used a gun but I do not know why you would ask. I merely attend spinning class every Sunday, I guess you could say my calves are my weapon! But you would not because I have never engaged in any violence. I have a job that I go to every weekday such as Tuesday but I cannot tell you where I work because it makes Will jealous and we have already argued in the car on the way here. Is there any other information you must know about oneself before I can go home with one of your fine computers to use it for business and the Temple Run and maybe other ordinary computer things?
apple store guy: I just... needed to get past.