• Crusade in Jeans

    Crusade in Jeans

    ★★½

    In which a young Johnny Flynn goes on a crusade to spread the gospel of football, Mars bars, and Queen. Flynn has said about this movie that “it’s a terrible film, but the money was really good.” Well I'm sorry, but 10-year-old me is very offended by that statement. I thought this movie was very good. Probably the best movie about time travel The Netherlands ever produced.

  • Emma

    Emma

    ★★

    no

  • Emma.

    Emma.

    ★★★★★

    Shout out to the servants Bartholomew and Charles. I see you <3

  • Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    ★★★★

    Seriously? This is the superhero movie people decided to hate? After coming from the MCU this is such a breath of fresh air. It looks so much better than any other superhero movie I've seen. It's bleak when it needs to be, but also has a lot of very rich and warm tones, unlike a lot of movies which just end up looking flat. It has a soundtrack that actually sounds like music instead of soulless theme park ride tunes.…

  • Far from the Madding Crowd

    Far from the Madding Crowd

    ★★★½

    "It is difficult for a woman to define her feelings in language which is chiefly made by men to express theirs."

    What a great fucking quote. Thank you, Thomas Hardy, a true ally.

  • Velvet Goldmine

    Velvet Goldmine

    ★★★★★

    A lavish, dreamy rock opera on the (de)mystification of stardom. Although it takes obvious—one could say excessive—inspiration from the life and art of David Bowie, this is more like Haynes's visionary fantasy version of that 70s pop music culture. From the music to the production design to the cinematography, every minute is utterly dazzling.

  • In the Basement

    In the Basement

    ★½

    I didn't like this film but here is my ranking of the people and their basements:

    1. Mini bar couple: No thoughts, head empty. Just sitting there in their private bar and wearing matching outfits.
    2. Model train guy: I very much like his train, and that incredible mural.
    3. Catholic needle lady: She seems chill idk.
    4. Laundromat women: Just standing there… menacingly.
    5. Emo teens: I feel threatened yet at ease.
    6. Fake baby lady: She just likes…

  • The Royale Incident

    The Royale Incident

    ★★★★★

    I can't believe we just let Tarantino get away with that. Somebody needs to do something.

  • Barbie in The 12 Dancing Princesses

    Barbie in The 12 Dancing Princesses

    ★★★★

    Time and again, film has served as a form of escapism that has pulled people through times of conflict and depression. By watching movies we are, for a brief moment, able to enter a new world and leave our own behind. Although I think all the Barbie movies have an escapist quality to them, none of them give such an explicit depiction of it as Barbie in the 12 Dancing Princesses. I also find that at its core, the story…

  • Mean Girls 2

    Mean Girls 2

    ½

    awesome!

  • Barbie as The Princess & the Pauper

    Barbie as The Princess & the Pauper

    ★★★★★

    I’ll just throw it out there straight away: I fucking loved this movie. It is my favourite Barbie movie of the ones I’ve seen so far.
    The Princess and the Pauper is a gender-swapped adaptation of Mark Twain’s The Prince and the Pauper. Although the book’s plot has been changed a great deal for the movie, I think the movie works really well on its own. It explores not only the theme of class structure, but also those of gender…

  • Barbie in the Nutcracker

    Barbie in the Nutcracker

    ★★★★

    A lot has changed this year, but at least we can still count on one thing: People will never stop talking about whether Die Hard is a Christmas movie or not. However, the real question they should ask is, “do I or my family really want to spend this jolly day looking at Bruce Willis’ sweaty torso?” The answer is no, you don’t. What you need is Barbie in the Nutcracker, because this movie has everything; adventure, action, ballet, romance,…