The Lake House Drinking Game
Sip:
1) Keanu talks to an inanimate object
2) Unnecessarily dramatic camera angle
3) Sandra wears capris
4) Keanu wears a blazer over a t-shirt/hoodie/turtleneck
5) Anyone wears a turtleneck
6) You recognize an outfit you wore in 2006
7) They sit/stand/walk in the same spot the other has just been
8) Keanu is earnest*
Gulp/Finish the Drink:
1) Keanu cries
2) Someone says, "It's about waiting."
*only if you want to get drunk
-Is this the end of the world? Is this the death of light?
-We are like a breath. We are a shadow that passes away.
This film worked for me in a very specific fashion. I certainly understand a reaction of weariness toward these stories about WWII; the constant invocation of human trauma that tears open wounds while also somehow allowing the trauma itself to become simplified and limited. Anyone choosing to skip this film--it is an understandable choice.
For…
STAY AWAY FROM HIM. HE'S A BOY!
-first of all the Dixon Sisters from Kansas City should have won and we all know that but I am grateful for the fact that they are clearly the mothers of Janelle Monáe and that's something
-Helen Hunt is so good in this. I'm forever in love.
-only tiny child Zachary is redeemable from the male representatives in this film
-KIDZBOP cover in this says "Girls and boys wanna have fun," and I…
I AM SO ANGRY AT THIS ENTIRE THING I CANNOT EVEN DESCRIBE. MY HOUSEMATE DEFINITELY JUST HEARD MY SCREAMS.
The absolute worst case of false advertising I have seen in an age.
The worst, because Netflix's goddamn trailer played up every single thing to make me think I would love this goddamn thing.
I turned on Netflix on Thanksgiving morning, because I had a blessed morning off (the first morning off in forever), and a trailer for this Netflix original…
