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  • Godless

    Godless

    ★★★★★

    Scott Frank is just on another level, apparently.

  • The Queen's Gambit

    The Queen's Gambit

    ★★★★½

    Pretty handily the best thing (show, mini-series, movie type of things) of the year. If there was any doubt that Anya Taylor Joy is one of the finest actors of our time (there shouldn’t have been), that doubt is now erased.

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  • Tenet

    Tenet

    ½

    Never seen a movie this convinced that it’s really smart when it is, in fact, really fucking stupid. And like, maybe if there was a plot thread, a character, a performance, a fucking moment of this that was engaging in the slightest, I could look past that. But no.

  • The Empire Strikes Back

    The Empire Strikes Back

    ★★★★★

    The following is a hypothetical review, meant to emulate how a certain kind of Star Wars fan would react if this film was released in 2019. Keep in mind none of these opinions are my own. Like, seriously. Not one of them.

    • “I hate these kangaroo horse things, it’s just an excuse to sell toys”
    • “LOL Luke knew exactly when to shoot the torpedo to blow up the Death Star, but doesn’t hear the 10 foot tall yeti…