Southland Tales ★★★★½

I got soul, but I'm not a soldier.

A good palette cleanser after two flicks that let me down. I really don't feel like I'm exaggerating when I say Southland Tales is the most ambitious film made in the 21st century so far. In just two hours and twenty-five minutes, Richard Kelly tries to pack in and dissect literally every single issue prevalent in America circa 2006, and unfortunately, all of them are still around today, if not even more prevalent. Does it fully succeed in its attempts? Not at all. If by some miracle it did, it would be the greatest film ever made. But since it didn't entirely, it'll just have to stick with being a deeply flawed, but in my opinion, truly great movie. Say what you will about the unconventional casting choices in the film, I can personally say without a shred of irony that Seann William Scott's performance(s) blows me away every time I see this movie. Honest to God think he could be one of the contemporary greats if anyone would cast him in something other than boner comedies. Southland Tales also boasts one of my favorite soundtracks out there in cinema. Moby's score is stellar on its own, but the needle drops are just impeccable. You may think your favorite movie has an ingenious needle drop, but is it really as good as this movie's needle drop of "All These Things That I've Done"? It's a funny flick, and it would be funnier if I couldn't help but slightly feel ashamed that with each passing year, we as a nation move further and further away from this being parody and just straight-up prophecy. Even on my fourth viewing of it, Southland Tales is confusing, cluttered, and just plain old weird. I cannot recommend it enough. Teen horniness is not a crime.

9.5/10

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