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  • Godzilla vs. Kong

    Godzilla vs. Kong

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Better than the last Godzilla movie but still a jumbled mess of motives and characters that don’t really need to be there. 

    The fighting was pretty good, though I wish we had seen more of Godzilla. 

    Despite the tag line being “One will fall”  one doesn’t fall. Literally none of them do. 

    This one made me Millie Bobby Frown.

  • Boss Level

    Boss Level

    Meh. Neither here nor there. Watch it or don’t, you won’t remember what happens for the most part.

    The most amazing thing is that Frank Grillo is OLDER THAN MY DAD AND LOOKS BETTER THAN I EVER WILL.

    Frank Grillo can grill-o my frank anytime.

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  • Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs

    Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs

    ★★★★★

    A movie I could watch a thousand times and never grow weary of it. A delight to the senses, a symphony of complexity. It’s like sipping on the finest Bordeaux you’ve ever had but for your eyes and ears.

  • Jesus Christ Superstar

    Jesus Christ Superstar

    ★★★★★

    It’s flaws are overshadowed by the potent 70’s FLAVOR this one brings. 

    You can practically taste the untrimmed bush and debaucherous, unprotected sex.

    You can’t not love the BDSM Pharisees, homoerotic Roman centurions, or the knockout performance Judas gives at the START of this mfer. 

    If you’re not into it in the first 15 minutes, you won’t like the rest.