• Space Mutiny

    Space Mutiny

    ★★

    Can't remember I watched the whole thing but I laughed when Rebediah Brown screamed.

  • Yonggary

    Yonggary

    ★★★

    Can't believe they actually call him Young Gary.
    Anyway this is fine. I like the first half better than the second because it has more interesting actors spouting nonsense lines in a committed way. Second half is your classic kaiju vs military jazz which always kinda bores me. A surprising amount of practical fx for a movie that is infamous for its computer fx. The only reason this has such low ratings is because "bad" CGI + unknown actors is…

  • I'll Give It My All ... Tomorrow

    I'll Give It My All ... Tomorrow

    ★★★★

    Fukuda seems to be one of the better directors adapting manga these days. Gets the humor of the source material across really well. It's these deadpan comedies that are firmly in his wheelhouse, too. Reminded me how much I miss Ikki. A magazine that you knew was just too cool to exist for a long time. Spent a lot of time browsing the Japanese site way before I could understand what was on there. Takayuki Yamada once again unrecognizable & nailing his character perfectly.

  • Milocrorze: A Love Story

    Milocrorze: A Love Story

    ★★★★

    The kind of anthology you'd expect from the mind of the guy who gave us Oh! Mikey (aka The Fuccons). Mileage will vary depending on your tolerance for quirky nonsense, but I felt it was more consistently palatable here than in Vermilion Pleasure Night. More proof you can throw anything at Takayuki Yamada and he'll make it work.

  • Live

    Live

    ★★

    Don't even know why I finished this. There's two scenes in the latter half with Asami that are good, and therein lies Iguchi's biggest failing as a director: not making her the star of every one of his movies. The rest of it is some uninspired, visually bland attempt to hop on the whole death games hype which I would be down for if it wasn't so undercooked.

  • Mother

    Mother

    There are too many movies named "Mother," please delete three. This one? Yeah it can go. If you come across this because you're a Kazuo Umezz fan, prepare to be bored. Which is something I thought I'd never say about anything Umezz-related. There's a reason he never directed a movie and it's all on display. Went in hoping for some late-career masterpiece of rapid-fire nonsense like "Fourteen," but instead got a very, very, very slow and uninspired example of an early 2000s J-horror spook show. Not rating this out of respect for Umezz, but… yeah.

  • HK: Forbidden Super Hero

    HK: Forbidden Super Hero

    ★★★

    Turned off a critically acclaimed Imamura classic for this movie where people fight each other using their taint so if you're still following me after this I guess you're in it for life.

  • Helldriver

    Helldriver

    ★★★★

    Don't know why Nishimura thought this needed 50 minutes of preamble before unleashing Mad Maxine Gory Road on us, but as soon as this hits full throttle I can't help but admire the creativity on display. The kind of zombie fiction you wish both the Resident Evil movies and games were. Well, I do. And I'm saying that as a fan of both. I haven't played Village yet but so far not a single instance of someone driving around in…

  • Vampire Girl vs. Frankenstein Girl

    Vampire Girl vs. Frankenstein Girl

    ★★★★★

    Whoever wins…… it's us! The viewer!! Mileage will 100% vary!!!!!
    Not sensible in any form or shape, but, well… duh?

  • Ghost Squad

    Ghost Squad

    ★★

    One of the ghost girls' special powers (powers that they all get by making out with the one living girl) is basically a dog hand puppet that she sorta just swings around and then sometimes there's lasers? Noboru Iguchi without a budget to do bonkers set pieces… it's a little ruff!!

  • Psychopath

    Psychopath

    ★★

    Merely okay Canadian thriller that changes things up enough to not completely lose you but feels like a TV movie in the bad sense that it lacks any style or punch to it. Movies I watched because someone* from Twin Peaks is in it.

    *Mädchen Amick

  • Hollow Point

    Hollow Point

    ★★★

    Would be a completely normal, serviceable DTV action movie if it wasn't for the fact that this has a CAST and they're all havin' a good time not taking this movie seriously at all.

    Thomas Ian Griffith: "My favorite mustard is grey poupon BABY," he says with the confidence of a successful man.
    60 year old Donald Sutherland channelling what if Billy Madison was an assassin, singing: "They're gonna find your anus on a mountain on Mars!"
    John Lithgow upon…