Look, I'm not saying this is literally a Batman movie, but the lead character overcomes great abandonment trauma from his youth by fighting evil in an armored car that detaches a motorcycle, and the villain is a psychopath clad in purple hell-bent on murdering hundreds of the metropolitan's innocent civilians via calamitously malfunctioning architecture.
TIGGER. Calm down, boy. I love you, but you derail this entire thing like five times over the course of the narrative. It's so impressively bad, you manage to chaos-reverse the mistakes you made back into working out in the end. Can't you see you're in the back of a moving truck, man? Sit down for a second!
"Christopher Robin" is such a weird, adorable movie. I gotta say, I'm of the generation (like the last five American generations, I'd…