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  • Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

    Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

    ★★

    the smart raptor is jar jar binks to me

  • The Silence of the Lambs

    The Silence of the Lambs

    ★★★★★

    the hannibal / clarice prison scenes remind me so much of when my girlfriend drinks at home. she'll have a couple and i won't at all (had to quit, just hit 7 years - bless!) and then she'll just stare at me with her big little Anthony Hopkin eyes and ask me a series of progressively more intrusive questions, beg me to tell her a secret about myself, and complain about wanting more chianti.

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  • Cats

    Cats

    ½

    I kept thinking how funny it would be if I killed myself in the middle of the showing so I whispered to my girlfriend, “you know what would be funny right now?” And she said, “If you killed yourself?”

  • Die Another Day

    Die Another Day

    wow, first thing that happens is James Bond walks into frame and fires his gun at me, the viewer. I have never felt so disrespected in my entire life and expect better from a man wearing a tuxedo. One star.