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  • Bad Lieutenant

    Bad Lieutenant

    ★★★★

    Abel Ferrara explores the themes of forgiveness and getting pussy mischievously in this spiritual prequel to 2003’s Bad Santa. The film’s strength is its simplicity, as it eschews a coherent plot in favor of 90 minutes of Harvey Keitel losing 100,000 dollar bets, doing heroin and looking at titties.

  • The Pope of Greenwich Village

    The Pope of Greenwich Village

    ★★★½

    The main character—played by pre plastic surgery Mickey rourke— is a dead beat father who behaves like he’s in the mob even tho he’s an unemployed restaurant manager. When given the choice between committing fully to a beautiful woman who is carrying his child and seems to love him unconditionally despite his many flaws OR try and outsmart the mafia so that he can continue to kiss his male cousin on the lips and shoe horn the word “capisce” into almost every sentence, he chooses famiglia over pussadicce. 

    This movie feels like very sophisticated anti Italian propaganda. Still pretty fun tho and the cinematography was cool

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  • Collateral

    Collateral

    ★★★★½

    An assassin teaches a guy how to get pussy by accident. It’s basically a Disney movie for guys who lost custody of their children. Shit rocked

  • Jaws

    Jaws

    ★★★

    I’m sure this shit wouldve blown my mind if I watched it in a polyester jump suit, after getting off work at a manufacturing job I didn’t know was about to be outsourced, next to my wife that I met when she let me raw dog her at Woodstock. But I watched it high as shit, in sweatpants in 2020 and though I don’t have a wife or family, what I do have that 70’s me doesn’t, is access to…