• Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

    Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

    ★★★★

    cassian andor i love you bitch. i ain’t never gonna stop loving you bitch

  • Just My Luck

    Just My Luck

    ★½

    if CHRIS PINE was considered unattractive simply bc he was clumsy and wore glasses then there’s truly no hope for me 🥲

  • Freaky

    Freaky

    ★★★½

    not me finding vince vaughn attractive when he was playing a teenage girl........

  • I Used to Go Here

    I Used to Go Here

    ★★½

    yes, being an adult and still being consumed with so much self-doubt that you continue to sabotage your own life and happiness sucks ass...also jemaine clement hot

  • The Children's Hour

    The Children's Hour

    ★★★★½

    this is why children and elderly folks don’t deserve rights

  • Wonder Woman 1984

    Wonder Woman 1984

    ★★½

    my excitement for rogue squadron suddenly went 📉📉📉 ...at least pedro was having fun

  • Soul

    Soul

    ★★★★

    as if i don’t experience enough existential dread on a regular basis...

  • We Can Be Heroes

    We Can Be Heroes

    📝 do not thirst watch a kids movie in the presence of others simply bc your fav is playing the hot single dad. you will humiliate yourself

  • Triple Frontier

    Triple Frontier

    ★★½

    jc chandor may not have given us an objectively good movie but he gave us so much more:
    1. oscar and pedro in a film together
    2. oscar and pedro briefly speaking spanish
    3. POLYAMOROUS HAWAIIAN GETAWAY (a title that a producer of the film approves of)
    4. this photo 
    5. and this
    6. and also this bigfoot sighting
    7. THE Wired Interview
    8. pedro gently caressing oscar’s head as they hug at the end of the film
    9. closeups of oscar’s fat ass
    10. POLYAMOROUS. HAWAIIAN. GETAWAY.
    11. and

  • A Most Violent Year

    A Most Violent Year

    ★★★★½

    mom: i love when he (oscar) speaks spanish 🥴💖
    me queuing up Triple Frontier: girl i gotchu

  • The Knight Before Christmas

    The Knight Before Christmas

    ★★

    if i didn’t watch this with subtitles i would’ve gone the entire movie thinking his name was Circle and that Cole was just a practical shortened version...

  • The Christmas House

    The Christmas House

    this is the only hallmark christmas movie i’ll ever log bc it was actually cute but more importantly it featured a gay married couple that did NOT include a dramatic coming out scene, it was just NORMAL