Batman ★★★★

This was one of the first VHS's I remember us having in the house when I was a kid. I still remember the little commercial before the movie with Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck shilling some catalog. Also, the Diet Coke commercial with Alfred. Why do we accept commercials on our home media?

We talk about Burton's moody aesthetic choices for Gotham and how he made it his own a whole lot, but I don't think we talk often enough about just how effectively this film uses its various settings. The movie actually basically comes right out and says its setting is more than just background imagery when Vicki insightfully points out, "You know, this house and all this stuff really doesn't seem like you at all," to which Bruce responds, "Some of it is very much me. Some of it isn't."

That doesn't change how unbelievably weird (and fun) these settings are. I love how much they often don't make sense. Like, why is Bruce's house a fucking casino when he's throwing that party? And hey, let's go have dinner at the art museum which is clearly also somehow a restaurant. And afterwards maybe we can go check out the cathedral that's 99% stairs that are so dilapidated that the building cannot possibly have passed inspection.

Anyway, scattered thoughts:

• Did this movie really start with a sex worker straight up hitting on a 9-year old or however old that kid was? What the actual fuck?

• Jack Nicholson is billed higher than Keaton and I am zero shades of okay with that.

• I wish Billy Dee Williams got to play Two-Face. But I also don't want to cancel out Batman Forever's existence. Basically, I wish Burton got to make more Batman movies but Schumacher also got to make his. I've mentioned this before.

• I like how Keaton's voice sounds slightly different when he's in "Batman mode" but isn't ridiculously over the top like Bale.

• Vicki is a lot more screamy than I remembered.

• The fight scenes in this movie are surprisingly good considering the suit was so restrictive Keaton couldn't turn his head.

• Bruce is a giant fucking hypocrite for killing the Joker (and a whole lot of henchmen) but then suddenly being a law and order centrist when Selina wants to kill Schreck in Batman Returns.

Miles Moon ⛤ liked these reviews