• House of Gucci

    House of Gucci

    β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…Β½

    Put two cards at the end saying:

    β€œPatrizia left prison after 18 years for good behavior.”

    β€œDue to an agreement signed by Maurizio she still receives a $1.5 million per year from Gucci’s estate.”

    and you’ll have the perfect movie.

    PS: It’s nice to see Ridley Scott try to steal Heavenly Creatures’s ending and not quite pulling it off.

  • Shame

    Shame

    β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…Β½

    While it's undeniable this movie is phenomenally directed β€” McQueen's movies are so sleek and their frame is made with such intention, they always seem ready made for an art gallery β€”, there's something really goofy about Fassy in a threesome while Adagio for Strings plays.

    Also (and I'm nitpicking here), like, the music turns really dark and goes BOOOM! as he gets a blowjob in a gay dark room? I mean, sure, it's sad, cuz he's hitting rock bottom,…

  • tick, tick...BOOM!

    tick, tick...BOOM!

    I feel I should've liked it more than I did (me and many of my friends have been living through very, very, very similar situations to these this past year β€” like, it's even a bit uncanny) and yet I feel somewhat nonplussed.

    We'll see if it holds up, in time.

    Also, I hope this banner stays because Andrew Garfield looks like a mad mathematician.

  • The Last Duel

    The Last Duel

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    So yeah, the eponimous last duel is pretty great, one of the best and most satisfying action sequences of the year in fact.

    I'm not fond of the structure though... It probably speaks more to the current power of TV how neatly this movie can be divided into three 45-minute segments. The whole Rashomon aspect of the story is just so old hat, the three stories that compose it so long and the differences so subtle, one has to ask…

  • Lady Bird

    Lady Bird

    It must be really nice to have this chill of a life.

    Call me when they dare to make a movie about being Beanie Feldstein's character.

  • The Worst Person in the World

    The Worst Person in the World

    β€œIt’s one of the world’s best anuses.”

  • Last Night in Soho

    Last Night in Soho

    This is such aggressively dumb bullshit I can’t even believe Edgar Wright had anything to do with this subpar Perfect Blue-cum-Repulsion script. The pacing is dull, the repetitive scares rarely have a sense of misdirection and the CGI heavy climax is just the worst.

    Technically there’s a lot to enjoy but man, I’m pissed off at this movie.

  • The Woodsman

    The Woodsman

    β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…Β½

    Clocking at a brisk 80-minutes, The Woodsman is the chilling but brilliant screen adaptation of Steven Fetcher's play about the erratic path to recovery of a convicted child-molester. What works it's not only the fact that such an uncomfortable and tabu subject matter as pedophilia is handled so fairly (Walter's tendencies are heinous but he's just as deserving of if not love, at least common decency as anyone else). It's not just the simple but effective way in which Walter's…

  • The Metamorphosis of Birds

    The Metamorphosis of Birds

    As an aesthetic feat, The Metamorphosis of Birds is an undeniable triumph and both Paulo Monteiro and Catarina Vasconcelos can only be proud of their achievements.

    As an experimental documentary though at some point it starts to cross the line between a movie and what can only be described as an illustrated audiobook. Now, narrated movies can be very good (It’s Such a Beautiful DayΒ remains to my knowledge the best movie of the last decade) but the preciousness of the…

  • Halloween Kills

    Halloween Kills

    Aggressively dull and melodramatic for a needless turn of the franchise into a Q-Anon parable but the POV deaths are disturbing.

  • Mandibles

    Mandibles

    Quentin Dupieux does Farrelly Brothers.

    Quentin Dupieux >>> Farrelly Brothers

    I will never get enough of Palme d'Or winner AdΓ¨le Exarchopoulos shouting all her lines. πŸ’˜

  • In the Intense Now

    In the Intense Now

    Pretty rich, coming from a billionaire.