Halloween ★★★★★

Ms. Activia before she went legit as the girl who is related to the wrong mother fucker. That iconic-as-fuck-pure-fuckin'-genius-holy-fuckin'-fuck-does-it-get-any-fuckin'-better-than-this score. Trick-or-treat mother fucker. First-person hack-a-sis clown-ownage. The compassionate Dr. fuckin' Loomis. Extreme-carjacking. The Evil is loose. Tommy loves popcorn and monster movies. Heavy-as-fuck breathing. Who the fuck gives the boogeyman driving lessons? A pay-phone warning. Speed kills mother fucker. The creepiest-of-creeps playing peek-a-boo behind a bush. The good sheriff. Tales from the graveyard. Yes you should fear the fuckin' reaper, especially when his fuckin' ass is driving right behind you. Acting not-high-as-fuck to fool your dad. All the girls love Ben fuckin' Tramer. A spooky haunted house. Lester the dog knows what the fuck is up. Who's that peeping in the window? Watching The Thing; how fuckin' ironic. Lucky-as-fuck-to-be-grounded Paul. Annie's last song and whistle. Scaring Lindsey. Death in a small town. The quintessential lets-drink-then-fuck-then-get-hacked-and-choked-to-fuckin'-shit teenage couple. Realizing you're the final girl. A desperate call for help. You can't kill the boogeyman. Close-quarters-closet combat. Emptying your gun into a fuckin' psychopath. Who is the boogeyman? Michael fuckin' Myers that's who. Often imitated and never fuckin' duplicated, John fuckin' Carpenter's Halloween is a mother-fucking masterpiece.

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