Melancholia

had a couple thoughts about this one:

1) what does it kinda say about me that i had a “hankerin’” to watch this movie? def would classify it as a hankerin’. seems to be a pandemic fav so i think others had a hankerin’ to watch it? honestly probably normal rn, but does feel like a weird movie to have a hankerin’ for - and i am gonna differentiate a hankerin’ from being “in the mood.” i was never really in the mood for this movie because of how bleak and lonely it is, but i had a hankerin’ for it because i knew that bleakness would satisfy my soul in a way no other movie could, more of a deep seeded need than a want. like, i’ve had a hankerin for chewing tobacco and i think that’s the perfect comparison here because i know that’s gonna be disgusting and i’m gonna feel like shit afterwards, but it does satisfy a primal need in both aesthetics and the buzz i get from it. so melancholia is like a big dip of kodiak is what i’m trying to say.

2) this is just kind of a question i wondered aloud, but when you imagine the universe, do you have your own visceral vision of an infinite galaxy or does your mine’s eye kinda go to a composite of various “universe” images from film, tv, etc.? the latter feels safer, a buffer to our own insignificance - there’s borders, it’s finite maybe - but really trying to envision and feel the former is exhilarating and daunting and frightening. i think it’s usually a combination of both, but just kinda wondered where everyone was landing on that one. also do you remember the first time you imagined the expanse of the universe? what i’m trying to say is let’s do mushrooms. 

anyway this is probably his best movie, trademark bleak energy anchored by genuine - even dare i say relatable? - characters. also by my count Dunst has now had sex on a golf course and a football field.

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