Varan_the_Man

Varan_the_Man

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Low budget doesn’t mean low effort

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  • Mobile Suit Gundam: The 08th MS Team

    Mobile Suit Gundam: The 08th MS Team

    ★★★★★

    Anime Marches On 2021
    90’s anime (1/4)

    Well I’ve finally done it. I found a Gundam show that I actually enjoyed. Sure War in the Pocket was “good” but I didn’t find myself really getting into the show. Not here. I fell in love before episode 1’s credits started rolling. What a masterpiece.

    It’s Gundam if it was Vietnam. Boom. Giant robots and guerrilla warfare in the oppressively hot jungle. Stacked with a truly phenomenal crew of memorable characters and some…

  • Garden Tool Massacre

    Garden Tool Massacre

    ★★★½

    Nothing starts a day off like some Shot on Video trash.

    Shot in perpetual darkness, British as fuck, and padded like so many of its ilk, Garden Tool Massacre still manages to be admirable and strangely watchable.

    Still I don’t think kitchen knives count as garden tools.

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  • Direct to Video: Straight to Video Horror of the 90s

    Direct to Video: Straight to Video Horror of the 90s

    ★★★½

    So this documentary doesn’t actually talk about the 90’s direct-to-video history like it implies, instead it follows a Beyond the Darkness format where actors, directors, effect guys, scream queens, and everyone else talks about specific 90’s DTV horror movies.

    A shame for sure but I’m such a sucker for stories and background revolving around these lesser talked about films. And this provides tons of that (almost 2 hours worth).

    It’s always great to see my icons like Fred Olen Ray,…

  • Bastard!!

    Bastard!!

    ★★★★

    Anime Marches On 2021
    90’s anime (1/4)

    “You forgot the most important rule of combat: you’re the macho ugly bad guy. Everyone knows the macho ugly bad guy can’t win, especially when he’s fighting the exceptionally handsome and popular main character”

    This shows so manly I grew a 6-pack by watching it. 

    The testosterone overflows the screen as buff badasses fight in a post-apocalyptic fantasy world using spells like “Megadeath” to protect seals with names like “Iron Maiden” and “Whitesnake”.…

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  • The Hurricane Heist

    The Hurricane Heist

    ★★★½

    How am I supposed to hate a movie where our main character uses the hurricane to turn a hubcap into a killer frisbee, impaling a dude through the chest?

  • The Grudge

    The Grudge

    ★★★½

    Daily Horror Scavenger Hunt 2 - August 2018

    3/31: Today we are watching an American remake of an Asian horror film. 

    So let me tell you all a little story about how this movie traumatized me so bad I almost avoided horror altogether.

    Rewind back to when I was 8 or 9. I had been dropped off at an in-home day care that I spent part of my summer at that year. The owner of the day care had a…